L’Oreal Voluminous Eyeliner: A Review & Repurpose

I received this eyeliner, L’Oreal Voluminous eyeliner in black, as a GWP with a mascara, and I’m grateful I didn’t actually spend money on it. If I had, it would have gone right back. This is probably the single worst cosmetic I have ever had the misfortune of trying to use.

L'Oreal Voluminous Eyeliner

L’Oreal Voluminous Eyeliner

I’ll start with something nice. This is a felt tip marker style eyeliner. The chisel tip is handy and easy to use. You can use it on the flat side for a wider line, or the edge for a thinner one, as swatched here.

Swatch of L'Oreal Voluminous Eyeliner

Swatch of L’Oreal Voluminous Eyeliner

That is where the good points end. I pressed fairly hard to get the solid line as swatched. The colour is not particularly pigmented. I suppose you could get a deeper black, more solid line with several passes over, but if I need the speed and ease of a marker type eyeliner, I’m not going to want to bother with several passes over. After being left to dry for 5 minutes, it didn’t set very well. I was able to smear it as shown. This product would have no hope of lasting through a rainy day, or on an even slightly oily lid such as mine.

L'Oreal voluminous Eyeliner, smeared after setting 5 mins

L’Oreal voluminous Eyeliner, smeared after setting 5 mins

When tested on my eye, I noticed a strange chemical smell I have never experienced with any cosmetic in the past. This eyeliner smells more like a sharpie than it does a genuine makeup item. After a few minutes on my eye, I noticed that it both stung and was starting to swell. I am not generally sensitive to anything at all makeup wise, so this was hugely surprising. Luckily for me, it did wash off easily due to its lack of pigment and staying power. The swelling lasted about a day.

After deciding this was never going on my face again, my resourceful side decided it needed a different use. My boots needed a touch up, and this marker did a respectable job!

My poor beat up leather boots! They are several years old but I can’t replace them being out of work and all, so I’m glad I can use this awful eyeliner to help them out in the meantime. A before and after. That is a very scuffed up leather toe, not dirt. Boots were cleaned before applying the eyeliner to the toes.

Badly scuffed boot, before

Badly scuffed boot, before

Badly scuffed boot, after

Badly scuffed boot, after

I’d imagine this touch up would wash off with one rainy day, however. Just grateful I found a use for this truly terrible eyeliner!

My negative review haiku:

Apply…. ouch my eye!
L’Oreal boot polisher.
No wonder it’s free.

Liz Claiborne Curve Crush and a Sexy Scent Study: A Review and Hypothesis

curvecrushThis fragrance has been out since 2003, so I was confused when I received a sample of it along with a completely different fragrance purchase. I can’t even say for certain if it’s still in production. Being an adventurous fragrance lover, I’m willing to give just about anything a chance. It was from a reasonably well known name (in the 90’s anyway) and was a flanker. How bad can it be?

I popped the top, dabbed a bit on my wrist, and regretted it both intensely and immediately. I was assaulted by a cheap, fake cinnamon smell, awash in lavender soapy blahness. If you spilled the cinnamon shaker on Grandma’s third best bowl of potpourri, you might wind up with something like this.

I visited my go-to source for all fragrance info, fragrantica.com. When I first looked and wrote my review there, they did not have a listing of notes. They do now, and they are listed as such: The fragrance features citruses, floral notes, tea, milk, sugar, cinnamon, cardamom, ginger, cloves, pepper, musk and vanilla.

I have a theory about this fragrance. I could be way off, but it’s still fun. Perhaps the developers got their hands on a study done years ago regarding which scents effected sexual response in the human male. This may sound familiar, the tests are quoted frequently. These tests were done by Dr. Hirsch and colleague Dr. Jason Gruss and some results can be found here: http://www.smellandtaste.org/_/index.cfm?action=research.sexual

At the top of the heap for “Increase in Penile Blood Flow” at 40% average increase was the fragrance (or fragrance combo in this case) of pumpkin pie and lavender.

Let’s break this down. Pumpkin pie… ingredients such as cinnamon, cream, sugar, cardamom, ginger, cloves, vanilla! Combined with lavender, as it was in the study, well you’ve got you self some guaranteed “test results”.

Of course I can’t prove this fragrance was deliberately structured in this manner. But being familiar with the cited test, there were just too many parallels to ignore 😉

And we return to me struggling to appreciate this fragrance. I could not get past the artificial cinnamon, and the “old lady” air freshener florals. The lavender just didn’t work for me here. It was creamy in an unpleasant way. I understand what they were going for but it really, really wasn’t for me. I found this unusual as I love other fragrances with cinnamon, creamy, sweet vanilla notes, such as my old beloved, discontinued warm and bracing Ralph Lauren Hot, which I will review at another time. I wanted to follow through with this scent to the drydown to give it a fair shake, but it made me so sick and headachey I had to scrub it off long before getting to that point.

The bottle is a nice purple shade, and is utilitarian enough. I do think the bottle style would suit a more sporty fragrance than this one, but if I like something the bottle is never a deal breaker (I’m looking at you, SJP NYC).

If this fragrance is your thing, good news. You can find it on fragrancex.com for a thrifty $21 for 100 mls or 3.4 oz.

Oh, and my negative review haiku:

Liz Claiborne Curve Crush

Potpourri bowl refresher

Why won’t it scrub off